At 29, Richard felt completely lost and had given up hope for his future. Here, he shares how a chance referral to Venture Scotland changed everything. Read on to hear about Richard’s exciting plans to volunteer and help others; his story shows the life-changing power of outdoor adventure and community.
I really just felt aimless. I’m 29, fat, a loser – that’s genuinely how I felt back then. January was when things got really bad and I got chucked out of my house, spending every single waking minute outside, just walking about Glasgow because I couldn’t be in my own house. I had plans to not see my 30s, if I’m being completely honest. I was completely lost with no aspiration, motivation, or determination, dealing with mental breakdowns on my own and getting thrown out of the house in an endless cycle.
Around March, my brother and I got thrown out again. I went to see a doctor who put me in touch with Janette, a Community Links worker who was meant to help me with housing. She genuinely sat and spoke to me and decided she wasn’t just going to help with that, she was going to reach out to other networks for me. When she mentioned Venture Scotland, I literally perked up and went, “that sounds really interesting. I’m excited. I want to do that.” For the first time, I knew what I wanted to do in life.
I’m quite a shy person, so when I first met the group, I was sitting close in on myself, thinking, “everybody looks so young compared to me.” But honestly, it was about five minutes in when Kat and James just managed to settle the mood brilliantly. James has such a calming influence; he’s a nightmare in the best way, bringing you right down to a level where stress isn’t allowed. Kat genuinely felt like somebody who just walked in off the street to talk to us, so calming and relatable. She made me feel like I’d definitely be able to do this.
It was actually the first bothy trips, which was probably the hardest because I am quite a socially anxious person and heading to a bothy in the middle of nowhere with a bunch of strangers seemed scary. But it was where everyone really came together. There was another hard part, meeting somebody I’m interested in. It’s been like ten years since I’ve even pursued anything, and I conquered that fear of rejection and went for it. By night two, we were all sitting around the fire chatting, day three everybody was completely riffing. It all just solidified that we’re all a bunch of weird idiots with the same kind of sense of humor!
Genuinely, Glen Etive was the best part of my whole experience. It was just magical! Just beyond amazing. We were within 30 meters of a big stag, we found lots of animals. At night, you could just lie down, and it was just totally calm, nothing…and James was teaching us the constellations, I tried to look when I was back in Glasgow, but you can’t see them because of the light pollution. Being up in Etive was genuinely the best experience of my entire life.
I learned that I kind of parent people a bit, I’m always trying to make sure people are safe. But I learned to stop being so protective, to calm myself down and just let people do their thing rather than dive headfirst going, “right, I’m helping you out.”
One of the biggest things I’ve brought into my life outside of VS is probably that I matter. That I’ve got a purpose. Penny, one of the Volunteers on my programme, nearly made me greet on Friday, just telling me how proud she is of me. I don’t hear that often at all. Basically, I’m my own worst enemy because I won’t take compliments, I’ll refuse them and say I don’t deserve them. But I am learning to be gentler with myself.
I have been dreading the programme ending because I’ve grown so fond of coming here, fond of the routine, the people, Kat and James. I’ve got plans though: volunteering with Venture Scotland, climbing groups, fundraising, maybe skydiving…I’ve got the bug for facing fears now. The biggest step I need to take is moving out of the house because I won’t ever be able to get better there.
For the first time in my life, I’m feeling excited about something. I know what I want to do in life now, and that’s massive for someone who was planning not to see their 30s. Most importantly, I’ve learned that there’s hope that things can get better, that I can get better.
This isn’t just a course I did. This is the thing that turned my life around. I’m not the same person who walked in here feeling aimless and worthless. I’m someone with a purpose, with plans, and with hope for the future.
That’s what Venture Scotland has given me – my life back.
Richard had to be placed on a waiting list for Venture Scotland’s programme in Glasgow Thankfully for Richard, funding came in that meant we could run one programme. At the moment, we don’t have the funding to run a programme like this for young people like Richard. Your support could change that. If you’d like to find out more about ways you can support us, check out this page or email fundraising@venturescotland.org.uk – we look forward to hearing from you!
Would you like to refer young people that you work with to our programmes? You can contact us at admin@venturescotland.org.uk – include your location and contact details to be put in touch with the Outreach and Support Worker in your area.